Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Hope for change

I am choosing today to begin another jaunt with my 40-days of good habits. It's not because of inauguration day, though it would be fitting given the hope that is almost tangible in the air. Whether or not you voted for, like, or even have a granule of respect for Barack Obama, you have to admit that he at least promises hope in a way that we haven't seen in a while. Now, whether he lives up to those promises is yet to be seen. But today, there is at least hope that he will.

No, the reason I chose to start over with this venture today is because it so happens that in 40 days, it will be February 28th. And that will end my first attempt at resetting my habits once again. It will be a clean break, and if I'm successful and able to start up again mid-March, that will end on April 30th. It gives me a couple week window between these mental and physical sprints and also a no-nonsense way to know when a session ends.

The main purpose of this is to lose weight. I am more overweight than I have ever been, and am really in a self-loathing downward spiral in part due to it. I'm trying not to let it get to me, I'm trying to find clothes that fit so I don't feel miserable going out in public. But it's getting more and more difficult and I just don't feel healthy

Today, I have hope that I can do this. I can start up again and get back on the right track. I even think I may take some of what we discussed at our staff meeting/retreat day with another area church and apply that to this process. I'm just hungry to not be here anymore. I'm tired of being miserable and uncomfortable in my own skin.

I know I missed a couple of points today, but that's why God created tomorrow. I'm trying to be thankful for this whole notion of one day at a time, so for now, I'm thankful that I hope I can learn to live that way.

Also, this girl is my absolute hero. Both for her witty blogtastic ways and her astonishing weight loss.

Off to floss and maybe even do the dishes. Maybe.

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